
The incredibly serious annual 'Saimoe' contest has come to a close with Hiiragi Kagami of That Sausage Anime narrowly defeating her sister Tsukasa in a battle rivaled only by Serena and Venus Williams. Saimoe is a Japanese government-funded social experiment to determine how much easier the I.Q. test must be made to maintain an average score of 100.
"A Win by Tsukasa would have shown a much steeper increase in global faggotry levels, but to be honest a win by anyone from as shitty a show as Lucky Star, even Kagamin, is troubling new," says Tokyo University head of the Gym Teacher Training Program Dr. Bend Squattrust. "Given Haruhi's wait being 'forever' we were expecting less than ideal results, but things turned out worse than we feared.
Saimoe has been conducted since 2002 and has proven itself in the past as a keen indicator of society's slow decline into a dystopian state of flat personalities and tsundere bullshit that not even the second coming of Onizuka could save us from.
"Most people believe that humanity's downfall will come from a nuclear holocaust, robot girlfriends, or a black man entering the White House," says New York PS118's Mr. Robert Simmons. "The truth is man's genetic end will likely come riding the dark horse of 2D fetishism."
The voting between Kagami and Tsukasa was very close all the way up until polling closed. Some Akihabara police officers feared riots from Tsukasa fans, but forgot that people that vote in these contests rarely leave their homes and likely decided instead to fap out frustrations. One Kagami supporter was quoted saying, "Their tears sustain me," which it turns out is a Stewie quote from Family Guy.
Its a well-documented fact that anime lovers posess not a gram of originality within their incredibly frail/frighteningly obese bodies.
Many academic authorities are looking to the future in an even bleaker light. "Some people are already calling for Taiga '09 which, honestly, is more frightening than Palin '12," said Oxford professor of doucheyness Buff Hardcheese. "Were she to win, it could really be the beginning of the end."